Day 32- Head over Heart

This happened on one Friday night on my way back from Hyderabad.

Its 9.30 and I get in to a prepaid taxi at the domestic airport at Mumbai to go back home. The driver gets in but along with him a younger man, very casually, also gets into the taxi and sits next to the driver.

I ask the driver, "Yeh kaun hai?". The driver replies, "Yeh bhi driver hai...usey Andheri highway pe utarna hain". I sternly reply, "Usko utaaro... yeh nahi aayega hamare saath." The driver looks at me and smilingly says "Mere bharose ka aadmi hai" as if trying to reassure me. I retort, "Aapka uspe bharosa hoga, mera nahi hai. Unko abbhi utarne ko bolo". Hearing my indignant voice, the man gets off without a word and then me and the driver head home.

- This situation has probably happened with many of us. The man may have been harmless for all you know and would have gotten off at Andheri as was meant to be. But what if he wasn't! Now imagine an outsider from a small city in my situation. With all the naivete and simplicity, would have surely believed the driver and accepted his request, believing it to be true. 

So I asked myself, "Are these the unfortunate stories we see in newspapers?."

Better to go with the head than the heart in situations when we are dealing with strangers and strange situations. Safety is non-negotiable!

Day 31 - "Come, make in India" - An inspiring rhetoric!

For the first time in my life time I sat glued to my couch and watched the entire speech delivered by a Prime Minister on the occasion of India's Independence Day. It was NaMo's first address to the nation as a PM and what a speech it was. It was grounded, passionate, full of hope, rousing and more importantly it was about each of us - young and old, rich, middle class and poor - It was about a Billion Indians.


He spoke about the importance of building a positive national character, skill building and making youth employable, he emphasized on cleanliness and vision of Swacch Bharat by 2019 (to celebrate 150th anniversary of Mahatma Gandhi) with toilets built in all schools, stressed on empowering the common man and on e-governance with focus on making a Digital India which would benefit the the smallest of towns with information and services, he spoke about launching a financial inclusion scheme to provide Rs. 1 lakh insurance to poor families. Through his speech, he inspired us to believe in a grand vision, “Come and Make in India”- inviting manufacturers from across the world to invest in India, and help boost India’s industrial growth. Also, called our attention to the importance of Zero Defect (product) and Zero effect (on environment) while doing so. Thus, making 'Made in India' a synonym of excellence. Indeed a grand vision which can only be expected of a man who's already established himself as pro investment and pro development during his reign as Chief Minister of Gujarat.

His rousing speech was not only about building a grand but realistic vision for India but he also took a moment to touch upon the various sensitive issues the citizens, more so women were facing in current times. He expressed his dismay on the recent rapes incidents frequently occurring around the country. He called on the parents to check and keep a tab on what their sons are up to rather than questioning their daughters. A sensitive point well made to a patriarchal society. Never before a PM has been upfront and addressed the nation on such delicate issues and that too so immaculately.

His speech was nowhere close to the empty rhetoric nor the monotonous fact presenting or humdrum report which we had grown accustomed to in previous years. In fact, many political veterans were quoted saying that it was the finest speech ever made by an Indian Prime Minister in a long time and also had many unique aspects. It was not only an awakening extempore speech but also it ran for over an hour, a longest speech probably only after the times of Pandit Jawaharlal Nehru. Another first was that the PM spoke from the ramparts of the Red Fort without the customary protection of a bullet proof glass, bringing him even more close to the largest audience which has ever attended a Indian PM's address on Indy Day. And last but not the least at the beginning of his speech he once again drove attention to the point that he was not addressing the people of India as “Pradhan Mantri” but as “Pradhan Sewak” – the first servant.

It was truly a fantastic speech by the leader of our country and if I have to go only by the weight of words then I can safely say we are in good hands. As an Indian, I felt truly proud and
also secure about the future of billion Indians.

Now, keenly looking for the man to walk the talk! Hope springs eternal!

For those who would like to hear his speech. Click this link
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=o1cxHe9TeD8

Day 30 - When 'Opting in' makes a huge difference.

This happened a week ago when I was traveling on work. It was my last evening in that city. I walked into the hotel room after a long day at work. Was glad to be back to what was my temporary abode for just one more day. The room service, like the past few days, was impeccable. And as I was admiring their handiwork, I noticed a small card placed on the neatly folded bed linen. It was a UNICEF card with two happy kids beaming on its cover and a caption which read 'Your $1 can change a child's life'. The card very succinctly highlighted how 100 million children miss out on the chance to go to school. It went to add how $1 can buy a notebook and how it can help a child to read and write and in turn have a chance for a better future. Then, what really caught my eye was that in order to support UNICEF's work, an extra US$1 was already being added to my hotel bill. If I agreed to it, I need not do anything but if I did not prefer to donate then I just had to inform them at the time of checking out.
And then the card signed off saying....
"$1 by $1, child by child. YOU can change the world."


I was an 'opt in' by default. If I didn't agree then I would have to opt out.

Very smart, I must say. Now tell me, who would mind a $1 being added to their hotel bill whether official or personal travel? Absolutely no one, right!

Now, it's been a week since I am back home. And since the last one week I have been seeing a series of advertisements and media coverage promoting August 13th as Organ Donation Day being propagated by Kokilaben Ambani Hospital and The Times of India. It's a noble cause which is also close to my heart. I was very happy to know that a big hospital and a leading newspaper have come together to create awareness for such a worthy initiative which has the potential to change the lives of millions who are either ailing or handicapped.
And then it suddenly occurred to me. We in India have the poorest rate of organ donation at 0.08 per million where as Spain which is acknowledged as the leader in organ donations has a whopping rate of 35.3 per million. A huge difference, right! And guess what, why is Spain so successful?

No prizes for guessing that one.

Spain has a legislation that acknowledges the presumed consent of the deceased donor (although the family's permission is compulsory), combined with highly qualified transplant coordinators who are permanently on call, that has added to high levels of legitimate organ transplants.
Which means, every Spaniard is considered as an 'opt in' case for organ donation unless his family thinks otherwise at the time of his/her death.
For such a fantastic cause isn't that the best policy to follow for any country. Undoubtedly, they have the best organ donation rate in the world. It's not compulsory, its still voluntary and yet so impacting. Tell me, how many would not want to donate their organs if given a choice.
So many lives saved, healed and made healthier.

I wonder, why do we not consider an 'opt-in' as a policy in India too. We have so many poor who have been in queues for a long time for an organ donor. On the other hand, the rich and influential manage to jump queues due to sheer money power. This policy may just wipe out the organ donation racket and many more will stand to benefit, and not just those who can wave a thick wad of currency notes.

The UNICEF promotion and Spain's organ donation policy are a case in point as to how a 'opt in' policy can be put to brilliant social causes. Seriously, it has potential to make a huge difference!

Day 29 - Just a short story

Had been stuck in office for a late assignment. It was time to wrap up work so I picked the cell phone to call my hubby. Its our small ritual so he knows that I am on my way especially when its beyond 9 in the night. His number is engaged for a long time. I wait for him to revert. No luck! He does not call back. That's uncharacteristic of him. So I try again and this time it rings for a long time but he does not pick up. I am irritated. Doesn't he know that its late and I am trying hard to get through to him. Or may be he's in the bathroom and so I try once more. But even now still no reply. Why is he not responding when he is supposed to be comfortably ensconced at home. Now I am totally furious and even sad. I have been trying to get through him continuously for 10 minutes. Typically, he will drop a message if he is not able to call back. But not a trace of that too.I shut down my lap top, pick up my bags, my lunch box and grab the keys of my office. I am stomping my way down the passage thinking of his callous attitude. I decide to try one last time as I am about to step out. His phone rings yet again. But this time the ring is not just filling up my ears, the familiar Nokia tune is also wafting into the office entrance door. It takes only a few seconds for it to sink in and I am standing, rooted to the ground and grinning from ear to ear. He picks my laptop bag and my other paraphernalia but he does not realize that in that single moment he has also swept me off my feet.


Moral - Why is it that we lose patience with those we love more than anyone? Why are we so much more patient with strangers than with ourselves and loved ones?

Day 28 - Poochne mein kya jaata hai!

This happened quite some time back when my office colleague and boss were on their way to an overseas official trip. They both were hanging around at the airport after clearing the security and my boss being an avid shopper could not resist entering one of the duty free shops. It turned out to be an exclusive showroom for designer watches. Within few minutes (like most men I know)he had zeroed in on one of the fancy watches in the showcase. It was the model he had been eying for a long time and finally he had found it! As my boss was checking on the price to make the payment, my colleague who was till now busy drooling over the encased time pieces joined him. He very casually asked him the price of the watch in his hand and literally fell backwards upon hearing the hefty figure. In his very natural instinct he asked my boss whether there was any discount being offered on the watch. On hearing this, my boss rolled his eyes in disbelief and said, "No way. This is a duty free shop where prices are fixed and you don't bargain here of all the places." He further added, "By the way, I don't mind if YOU are going to ask this question to the salesman over the counter but I am definitely not with you.' Saying this my boss slinked away as if disowning my colleague who was about to ask an embarrassing question. My colleague was not going to relent. He went straight up to the smiling face in the dapper suit and asked him plainly if there was any discount on the time piece. Guess what! After much humming and hawing the salesman politely answered, 'Well sir, we can offer you a 15% discount on this watch. If you are fine with the price, should I go ahead and gift wrap it for you?'  Well, well, well! Can you guess what the scene would have been like as they both collected the watch and exited the showroom?
Obviously, my colleague had the 'cat who got the cream' look on his face but my boss (as he accepted later) had learned a great lesson that day. 'Poochne mein kya jaata hain'.
Since that incident, every meeting, our boss recounts the incident to all those who have not heard about it and emphasizes the importance of asking and negotiating. Whether one is asking, negotiating, seeking help, looking for advice or just clarifying a doubt; asking never hurt anybody. A lot of people don't ask because of the fear that they may look small, naive, dumb, helpless etc. But no, that's not the case at all. If at all it does any change, it's only positive. It makes us better and 'richer' than what we were before. In fact, I remember a Tata Sky campaign which ran very successfully in 2013 with the theme - 'Poochne Mein Kya Jaata Hain'. It was a great execution by the creative team of this simple but often ignored insight. They used it effectively to convey their message about a discount offer on Tata Sky package being promoted.

And above all, doesn't the Bible also say, 'Ask and you shall receive'. So go ahead I say, its never too late to ask!

Day 27 - When you find all the answers in your cupboard!

Cleaning stuff gives me a big high. Whether its cleaning my cupboard, shoe rack, my dressing table drawer, my jewellery box, the attic, the medicine kit, the kitchen cabinets, refrigerator, what have you. Cleaning and organizing gives me the bliss that's unequivocal. Also, disposing off or chucking away all those things which are worn out, defunct, useless or don't use anymore is another pleasure altogether. As a kid, I won't be lying if I tell you that I used to actually envy (secretly) the job of the municipality sweepers. I thought they had a cool job and even felt that I could do their job with much more flourish, exactness and that's no 'sweeping' statement.
Obviously, I never could fulfill my childhood fantasy and the chance to wield my personal broom stick! But as the years moved on, so did my versions of 'What I would like to be, when I grow up?' fantasies.
So here I am, fulfilling one of my long withheld desire,  not as a professional (thankfully!) but as a hobbyist. To me, there is no greater joy than unearthing a few trinkets from the hidden crannies, extricating an old pair of jeans that I once again can fit into, finding a silk scarf I thought was lost forever and many such moments of discovery. Not to mention, the favorite cream bottles, oils, shampoos and moisturizing lotions which were unused for long but finding them to be still within their expiry dates. Fancy leather sandals which I thought had 'kicked' the bucket and then find them to still have many years in them. Also, the Tupperware storage containers I thought had been sent to next door neighbor to share some home cooked experiments and never came back, only to find them 'self-contained' and sitting smugly in a corner. And hey, I forgot to mention the many forgotten timeless classics that I stumble upon as I reach out my hand deep inside the library shelf. There is definitely serendipity at work here.


Just like all my previous 'clean-up' weekends, this one too went off exactly as expected, rummaging, clearing and cleaning, albeit with a small difference.
As I was cleaning the medicine cabinet and  going through the many tablet strips, ointments, balms, vitamin capsules, tubes, sprays, I had a sudden realization, as if like a shot in the arm .
I remembered a Hindi lesson that we learned way back in school, 'Mama ki Ainak'. The Mama in the story i.e. the Uncle goes around the whole house searching everywhere looking for his spectacles which have been misplaced, only to realize much later that they were sitting all along on his forehead.

Isn't our life exactly like this? We all go through life seeking answers for questions, problems, issues, difficult situations at one point or another. To find the key to the lock, we go out to hunt for it. Though each of us have our own method of seeking the right answers, the one thing common for sure is, we forget to look for it within us to begin with. We fail to realize that the 'magical solution' is not outside or anywhere else but lies within us. We are just not attuned to seek it where its supposed to be. So, just like 'Mama ki Ainak', we go about searching high and low, here and there to find it, obviously without any result. All we need to do is just 'change our lens' and perspective and then it becomes all crystal clear.
That weekend as I sat amongst the mess sifting the old medicines from the new, I didn't anticipate that my old childhood fantasy would eventually help me 'find' the simple elixir of life along with a few strips of Vitamin D3 tablets.

Next time, when I am searching for something (answers), I must remember to first check my cupboard (my soul) before I go out shopping (seeking) for it elsewhere.

Day 26 - Laughter is the best medicine!

"Laughter is the best medicine", a many times heard before quote. In school it was just something I learned by rote. During the carefree college days, I experienced, understood its true meaning and that's something to note. But in my busy life today, it's every other thing I dote on more and poor laughter gets the last vote.
Indeed a sad situation all too common nowadays, where laughter has been forgotten as we have all become wet blankets and dusty, old turncoats.

We have become more serious and grim and less funny than ever before. It's not a surprise then that we are all falling sick more often than earlier. We need laughter clubs to compel ourselves to laugh, that too with strangers. And we need TV sitcom marathons to help us find and tickle our rusty funny bones. The only laughter we hear (or rather see) nowadays is either in the form of LOL, LMAO or ROFL. A laughter which has lost its voice just like the songstress from yesteryear.

So I ask, where is that laughter which emanated from the bottom of our heart and our protruding belly? Or where is that full throated roaring laugh which came from the biggest guy in the nearby gully? When was the last time you laughed so hard that you cried or peed in your pants (yes, that also happens with some people)? Or when was the last time you laughed uncontrollably without any rhyme or rant?
It just seems such a long time ago, isn't it. Indeed a serious matter but laugh it off, we just can't! (ironically).

We take ourselves too seriously and attribute laughter as trivial and fluff. But what we don't realize is that it's our all time trump card more so when the going gets tough. Nothing can soften a hard stand or loosen a tight situation like good humor can. The crisis of today is the joke of tomorrow, H. G. Wells once said, which all of us must remember as long as we can.

"Laugh and the world laughs with you; weep and you weep alone" is the popular phrase we all know. Let us break away from our hardened shells, let our hair down and be at ease with our best friend 'laughter', we all used to know.

"A day without laughter is a day wasted" is what Charlie Chaplin once said. We need to reexamine how we lead our lives to know how without laughter it gets weighed.

To sum it up, Mark Twain very rightly said, "The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter".

Its time we stopped taking ourselves so seriously. Life is too short so lets enjoy a good laugh as we are not going to last here.

 

Day 25 - A to Z of love

 

We are in the middle of February and its the season to celebrate, declare, reinforce, remember, redeem, cherish, rekindle...what else but love! At the cost of sounding cliched, this feeling of love is truly in the air and all pervasive around the 14th of February. Whether one believes in Valentine's Day or not, the marketing blitzkrieg ensures that all of us are a part of this silly charade willy-nilly. But hey, who's complaining!


Whether its our parents, sister/brother, spouse, daughter/son, friend, neighbor or colleague the recipe for any  successful relationship remains the same, albeit with varying measures. Here is my list of those ingredients for making the sweet rich concoction of a strong healthy relationship.

Presenting my A to Z list that makes the essence of my relationships richer, fulfilling and long lasting.

A- Appreciate, what the relationship has to offer and Acceptance
B- Being yourself
C- Commitment
D- Devotion
E- Expressing openly
F- Freedom
G- Give and take, the cardinal rule of any relationship
H- Honesty
I - Independent yet with a sense of belonging
J - Just and balance in responsibilities
K - Keeping the faith and having patience
L - Lively
M - Meaningful interactions
N - Never taking for granted
O - Open and transparent.
P - Passion

Q - Quietude

R - Respect for each other
S - Stimulating
T - Trustworthy
U - Unrequited
V - Veritable
W - Willingness to make it happen
X - X Factor (for lack of relevant words starting with X :))
Y - Being Young at heart
Z - Zealous

All said and done, I must confess that the above is a wish list and I continue to work on many aspects to make my relationships stronger and healthier. Its always work in progress and I guess we just need to keep working hard at it.


I am sure you too may have your own ingredients or the A to Z list for your relationships. Whatever the recipe, let us celebrate the feeling of love and cherish what we have with and within us, all through the year and our lifetime. Not just on Valentine's Day.


Love & Peace,
xoxo

Day 24 - What a woodpecker and soldier ants taught me?

I stay in Goregaon, a part of the western suburbs situated just a few kilometers away from Sanjay Gandhi National Park aka Borivali National Park. On Sundays, the park seems even more close considering there is no traffic on the road (and which many Mumbaikars will endorse). But in spite of the close distance, I hate to admit that I have been to the National Park only once before. It is supposed to be the largest park in the world, located within city limits and truly a place to be visited many times over. But today was just my second visit to these sylvan surroundings. Such a shame!

A walk through the Shilonda trail inside the National Park was what the e-brochure of Bombay Natural History Society (BNHS) enticed me with its foliage of words. And so here I was, on a chilly morning in February, ready to bathe in the serenity of the green expanse and soak in the knowledge, the birds and the bees (pun unintended) had to offer. The brochure had mentioned that the trail is about 15 minutes walk from the main gate of the National Park and so it was. Typically, this trail is out of bounds for general visitors unless they have permission. Its accessible only through naturist clubs like the Bombay Natural History Society (BNHS) and NIC etc. And that's exactly what excited me even more. I prefer quieter locations such as these where one can enjoy nature at peace, away from the din of the picnickers and the clamor of motley crowd. Its so unbelievably peaceful that its difficult to believe that this is the same noisy Mumbai just a few meters away.
The trail itself runs for about 2 km into the jungle up to a stream. The dense growth of deciduous trees mixed with the bamboo groves provide an elusive tranquil all through the walk in the woods.  The vast variety of birds, insects, butterflies add their own beauty which is a visual treat and a welcome respite. For any Mumbaikar this is truly the right place to relax, find solace and their true self. Neither a biologist, ornithologist nor an entomologist I am but a Sunday ensconced in the lap of mother nature was just the kind of getaway my frayed nerves were seeking for.

There were myriad of tidbits we heard all through this trail. But there was one fascinating fact, Mr. Jagdish Vakale, Naturalist at NIC and our guide recounted to the group that has still not left me.

He told us the intriguing fact about a bird and colony of ants. The ants are popularly called as soldier ants and crematogaster by the entomologists. They use dry leaves, their saliva and mud to build a robust nest for its colony. This nest resembles a Pagoda and hence gets its name as Pagoda Ants nest. This nest is almost impregnable to any species as these ants are known to be fierce and attacking and also the nest is as hard as a card board. However, there is  one bird in spite of these challenges actually considers this nest as its home and stays inside it along with the colony of ants. The bird is known as Rufus Wood pecker. This bird secretes a chemical, pheromone. And this is the same pheromone which the soldier ants also secrete and makes them think that the bird is part of its own family. So, in spite of Rufus Woodpecker not being an ant or an insect but a totally different species, the soldier ant allows it to stay in its well built nest.
Rufus Woodpecker on the other hand just does not stay there like a ghar jamai but it in turn   provides food to the ants. All the tidbits and insects it collects and hunts for its family does not get consumed completely. The babies eat a little and litter the nest with crumbs. This leftover is then eaten by the soldier ants. Thus saving the ants the energy to go out and hunt for food.

An incredible example of give and take between completely different species at work here. It shows how 2 different types, completely unlike each other, by helping one another in a symbiotic relationship can live together peacefully and graciously.

For me its a wonderful lesson which nature has provided! We as humans and considered as the most evolved species on earth can take a big leaf out of the Pagoda Ant's nest. I am sure there will always be differences and contrasts between each of us in the way we think, live, eat, drink, communicate, behave and function. However, its up to us to find out how we can use these differences to learn from other, respect each other, give and take and live in harmony and peace. On the occasion of Valentine's Day, a beautiful insight from nature on how to have beautiful and meaningful relationships.

Day 23 - When you find inspiration in most unusual places

I am returning from a short 1 day official trip to Bangalore. I was there to attend a focused group discussion. The objective of this group discussion was to help us outline a marketing strategy for one of our organization's project management certifications. It was an intense and fruitful discussion and we are hoping it will throw some light on our future course of action.
I am sitting in the plane at this moment, heading back to Mumbai. But what is consuming my thoughts right now is not what should be my next course of action (read, marketing strategy). Its the cab driver who has just dropped me off at the airport. Iqbal is the cab driver and this is not the first time he has dropped me off at the airport.
Every time my Bangalore visit gets confirmed, the next call goes to Iqbal for confirming the airport pick up. Its not just me, but all my colleagues traveling to Bangalore make use of his taxi services. I have been with PMI now for the last 3 and half years and every time me or my colleagues have flown to Bangalore, its always Iqbal's taxi. So much so that even Ashish (my hubby) and Aparna (my sis) have used his services for their local travels in Bangalore. They have also been happy with his services and further referred him to their peers and colleagues.
Now you may wonder, what's so special about this Iqbal? Why is he so popular and sought after? Let me answer that for you.
First, he is always punctual and reliable - he will always shows up on time, come hell or high water. Second, he is very resourceful - he will always find a way out of the maddening Bangalore traffic and drop you at the airport in time, even when you expected to miss your flight. Never have I or my colleagues missed a flight from Bangalore. Last but not least, he is extremely courteous and respectful. He always has a kind word to say. All these 3 characteristics have not only made him popular with with us but also helped his business grow through referrals as you can see.

Three years back, he used to work as a driver with Meru, the taxi fleet service. The next time when I met him, he had quit Meru and had started his own Taxi service with a brand new Logan. Later, the following year he had purchased a second Logan, which was being driven by his brother.
And this time when I met him, he had even better news. I heard him express that he was getting tired and stressed driving around the busy roads of Bangalore. He had plans to give up the taxi business in the next 3-4 years.
Cooking had been his life long passion and so he had plans to start a catering business soon after that. He said he was just waiting for his children to complete their education so he could then hang up his driver's boots forever and proudly don the chef's hat. A scene he had been dreaming off for very long.

Having seen him on all my intermittent visits to Bangalore, he had truly come a long way in a short span of time. His future plans did impress me and I am sure that just like his taxi business has gone places, his catering business would also sell like hot cakes. I can only imagine his mouth watering signature dishes getting word of mouth publicity all across the Silicon valley of India and beyond.

So, here I am sitting in the flight and thinking about Iqbal, who has been not just our typical 'go to' cab driver in Bangalore but a very successful marketeer too. He has through referrals and word of mouth marketing, not just built a successful business for himself but successfully planned for an early retirement to follow his lifelong passion.
All I can say is, one doesn't always need focused group discussions, market surveys and reams of research material to provide you key insights. We can indeed find them in the most unusual places.

Thank you Iqbal and wishing you Godspeed for your future plans!!!

Day 22 - Our perceptions are not always ground reality!

This is my story which is many months old now. An office colleague and me were not exactly on great talking terms because of a few situations during the course of our work had not gone as expected. In our heads, we held the other one responsible without overtly blaming each other. This situation encouraged us to create perceptions about each other. Perceptions, which we kept carrying along with us silently for few weeks. Slowly, we were building layers of reasons and reinforcing our own perceptions as time passed by. As a result, there was a feeling of awkwardness whenever we dealt with each other. These perceptions (read, opinions) were not really helping both of us in having a healthy working relationship. Honestly, both of us did not really attempt to clear the air by openly talking to each other. Either it was an ego issue or both felt that the perceptions we held about each other was the ultimate truth. Weeks turned into months but no one budged.
Our boss finally sensed this animosity developing between us and decided enough was enough. He decided to bring this out in the open in a subtle way. So, in of our meetings, he decided to engage the entire team in a no holds barred discussion. We all got occupied in discussing, debating and brain storming on various ideas and initiatives for future. One of the problem areas identified by the team was that all of us had a tendency to work in silos. No one had a clue of the developments in each others work areas. This was not at all favorable for the growth of the team and organization and something had to be done about it. My boss announced that we will introduce a "buddy program" experiment where each of us will shadow the other like in a chain. For eg. A becomes a buddy to B, C becomes a buddy to D and so on. And as a buddy we would need to know what's happening in each others work areas. Be there for each other and also provide feedback and solutions from a 'outsiders' perspective. It all sounded very good to us and we all agreed to be a part of this experiment. As luck would have it, our boss made me and my 'dear' colleague as buddies of each other.
May be it was preplanned, I don't know. But given the past, it was not going to be easy for both of us.
All said and done we both committed to make it work.

Its now almost 3 months since we started this 'buddy program' experiment. I am happy to say that not only do we have a better working relationship today but I have also realized that the perceptions I held about him were somewhat wrong (and likewise, he about me). The animosity has completely vanished and given way for respect for each others work.
Well, it wasn't really that easy as it sounds. The coldness and aloofness of the first weeks gradually thawed which led to a few arguments and discussions in the following weeks. Then, we realized how wrong we were. We were so caught up in our own stories that we kept reinstating and strengthening our long withheld judgements as we went along. But by opening up through the 'buddy program" experiment, we started seeing things from each others point of view. We finally realized the truth and that was, we were wrong and unfair to each other.
The deep seated perceptions have now been pulled out at their roots and given way to a new   perspective which is positive and healthier.

In a nutshell, we all carry perceptions in our heads about people, places, ideas based on our few experiences and observations. We keep making them 'stronger and truer' by feeding it with new reasons. And then, it becomes so deep rooted that it becomes a reality....our reality. And that's the story we love to carry in our heads for the rest of our life. And by doing so, we tend to lose a lot. Believe me, a lot!
So don't hold to your perceptions so tight as they are only YOUR stories and YOUR reality, the ground reality could be totally different.
Be open, give a chance and have a mindset which is open to new possibilities and new beginnings. That's how we can truly grow as human beings.